Ass out of me.

Maybe u, but me, anyway.

That's a theme I need to stop, and the main problem of the day. I DID send my kitten kisses, and I want to know why they didn't go through, but that'll be something I'll have time to figure out. I used to be so much better at that. In the mean time, I think I'm starting to get past my derp enough to handle what I should be doing to make this better. Knowing me, that's not a fix... but a road to improvement is nearly as good.

In the mean time, I am a bit excited about the package I'm hoping to send this week. It'll mean learning to do a thing or two, as well as how packaging and shipping works, but that's not a bad thing to learn. And I think she'll like it. Of course, a delay is possible, but my aim is to have it shipping by Friday.



...why is that song... I don't even...

Good news and bad today. It sounds like, after review, mostly good, but I don't to trust my luck further than I have to. I do it a bit much already.

Tomorrow is classwork, Tabi's test (hopefully The Stand), some driving, and yardwork. I want those bushes trimmed because they look funny and... for some reason that's the kind of light, but productive yardwork I enjoy. Shame there's so many bushes.

iashjjdsjlfjklefjkl

Parallel parking should not be this hard.

It doesn't even look that hard. The concept is simple. Yes, I never expected to get it day one. Yes, I did get some progress today. But geeze. Pull up parallel the spot in front of the one you want. Back up into it at a 45 degree angle. When the back nears the curb, turn the wheel sharply in the opposite direction, then continue to back up in order to even out. Make minor adjustments backing up or moving forward where necessary.

Simple idea. Maybe not "simple" simple, but not rocket surgery.

Yes. Surgery with rockets.

Anyway, work is progressing too. I think tomorrow is gonna be a lot of house chores and stuff like that to make me feel all comfy and accomplished, and probably make me crave a good ol' nap. I miss naps. Needing one is not fun, but naps were always nice.

Also thinking I'll plug into my presentations work. I enjoyed that, learning power point simply and making progress.

Also, need to start reading. The kitten will leave me far enough behind as is. Fishy must needs to increase his reading speed.

Certainty, or Ambition?

I've got a few things to look at in the coming up weeks. I'll want to pick out a couple courses for certain, though we've got two strong competitors already, and then get registered for the fall. They're both 8-week so they should only take half the fall- but probably the latter half of it. So this is a grand opportunity. If I can convince them to fund me, I can move down, get set up, moved in, and have myself settled for work all before the books have to come down for me to get ready for my classes. The question is though, should I take one class, or two? Easier ones, or harder? Regardless, I'd like them to take chunks out of what I'll need to graduate. Any headstart will be fantastic.

But is it better to get hard things out of the way, really prove it all?

Or to look at the tight situation and setbacks, and look for what to do to make sure things can't go wrong?

I'm never quite sure what to do about my thought method.

It works fine for most things. I process quickly once I internalize information, though I am often slow about that. I can analyze and go deep into things. Though my memory is terrible. And maybe that's a part of it. Tabi focuses heavily on some subjects, and so she frequently applies lessons from movies, TV, just about anything entertainment media we view as lessons to them. Sometimes the impression of the "ah-huh" when someone on a TV show quotes some good advice that she views applicable reminds me of Bible-thumping. But that's not the point. The point is that I don't process things that way. Maybe because my brain doesn't focus on the same things long and hard. Maybe it's bad memory. Maybe the lines are hazy of complex and mine do tend to go different directions. I'm sure it's also partly because while I view TV as capable of giving sound advice I'm naturally very skeptical of taking literal meaning to heard from enetertainment media.


Sometimes an idea is a good idea, but it being in a movie doesn't justify it or anything else, necessarily.

And now there's worries and concerns about her worth, and, well...


It's so hard to find the proper line between turning her over my knee and striping her ass and treating her like a princess, to show her now much she's worth. Despite all the trials and troubles she's had. Hell. She might like to pretend they make her less somehow, but life is what happens in it. To you, or from you. And she's had a lot of life, and made a hell of a lot more out of what was laid on her plate than anyone I know has made sense of.

That tells me very well about what kind of worth she has.

And I'm still counting.

Today was full of big things.

First of all, all of the planned for today's stuff didn't happen- so tomorrow is pretty much going to be all the stuff that was planned for today, and a haircut. Somebody else needs one and mine is coming due. Suddenly, A Close Shave plays in my head. Go figure. But anyway, haircut and catch up is tomorrow, but at least my school work has a lot more settled and I've gotten into it a bit.

Also went for a long drive today- we took some back roads neither of us had ever taken before, and while dealing with being fairly lost, navigated our way to MSM, pulled through, and turned around. The whole trip took about three hours, but there was a bright side- I did fantastic on the driving, was able to calmly pick up on what few issues I had, and improve on them all in the same drive. I even was able to navigate most of the way home without needing to rely on instructions, and I didn't feel entirely shabby about doing the drive from memory. My one new issue I've found, though, is a small tendency to push the speed a bit on smaller roads when I come off of big ones. You just feel so slow on little roads once you're coming off something fast.

The discussions are also still going on, and I've still mostly got one answer- don't let it be an issue.

If it somehow becomes one... I can manage.

I know that I can find a way to make it work out without driving a wedge imbetween us.

But I don't want that to come to matter in the first place. So I'm turning my focus to making sure the other bit comes out just fine. But I do think a meditation/brainstorming period tomorrow would benefit.

Big day. Big things.

Also, fourth of July.



Go blow something up.

Patriotically.

Today I accomplished some good things.

I also have a new- potential, since it's not certain and my aim is to make sure it never becomes an issue anyway- problem coming up though, and I can't seem to come up with solutions. Granted, I have one single solution, and it's the one I'm planning my energy and focus toward. But alternatively? What am I going to do to make up for the lack if that falls through? The first thing thrown out I do not like. Do not like it at all. But considering the rather stringent requirement any thing else has to go through to cover the same ground... I'm having shit luck coming up with a different route.

At least I got to have some fun doing something different. The party was pretty decent. still not my scene, but few parties but ol' New Years seem to prove to be. But learning to get better at them is helpful.

Anyway. Tonight is gonna be about drilling the problem into my head so I can remember to think on it some when I wake up. We'll see how much time I get for drilling, I think the pillow is gonna put me under fast.

Today: Wracking my brain, stress, problem shooting. Got a 90/100 on my pre-class "exam". Lots of cleaning done in the room and around.

Tomorrow: Got to finish cleaning/organizing. Starting into the first day of school work. Also going to prep for more jobhunting and badgering of potential jobs.

Bloggerificism time.

Writing blogs.

All the way.

Umm, today was interesting. Husking the corn was no big deal, despite that people claimed I did exceptionally well... and I didn't do anything special, just looked at it, figured out how to take it apart well, and then plucked the left over strings. I tend to be good at taking things apart. If only I was that good at putting them together, there'd be good money in it. After that I got subjected to some ideas I want to try and a sudden urge to learn to grill, only to learn the grill is empty on gas. So, that'll have to wait a bit.

However, that and the dinner- chicken apple sausage- got my brain going rapidfire on all teh stuff laid out, and now I can't help but feel like I'm wanting to tear apart the kitchen trying some new combinations. Of course, I also feel mildly jittery for soem reason, so without more focus it'd just end up making a mess.

Maybe tomorrow.